RAAAAARR!! I'm the Andreasaurus!!

Drink is the only reason I have friends. Thinking about it. I only ever see my crew when going out. One of the perils of being one of the lads/ living out of town/ working all the time I guess. My point is, I can be ready, dolled up and about to go out for the bus to town, and I’ll suddenly feel sick, scared and sad. I convince myself that it was me who invited myself out to their night and I wasn’t invited. That none of them are really my friends and that they all actually would love nothing more than for me not to be there cramping their style and clinging on to them all night.

Every. Single. Night. Out.

There have been 4 this month already (Inc NYE) and I have drank so much to get to a level of calm and confidence that I have blacked out 3 of those nights. Not remembering the stories from the night before at all! Be they big embarrassing things or serious business or little funny mishaps. The one time i didn’t was deliberately cut short cause i had work in the morning.

Am I using my drink to fit in? Or am I just keeping up with the guys like I used to (and failing)? Or am I really just a hang on of the group? Or do I just need a slap and told to stop drinking as much?

I am embarrassing myself. I’m not ashamed of what I’ve done/ apparently done at all! But I can guarantee I wouldn’t had I been of a sober mind. Id have been thinking on one Count. And I’d have been too shy on the other.

-end rambling-

ilessthanthreetea:

Northfield has 35% of its children living in poverty and Tillydrone/Seaton/Old Aberdeen has 31%.

… he’s kinda beautiful. We swapped numbers. I’ve got a date with him on Sunday. I mean, I guess it’s a date? I’m going over to his for dinner and Transformers 3.

I’m absolutely terrified.

I’m 22 and I’ve never been on a date. Ever. I know I’ve no reason to be scared. I just have no idea what I want/ what I’m getting myself in for/ if I’m even ready for a guy in my life. I’m worried I’ll make a tit of myself. I’m worried what he wants from me/ what he expects from me. I know men aren’t all the same but how do you know? I’m a big girl now. I shouldn’t be scared of these things. But I am.

Oh my. I sound like a gorram angsty teenager *facedesk* had to say this somewere tho. FaceyB ain’t safe!

cannot be doing with the drama